I want to continue the conversation from my previous article, “Why I Catch Feelings, and Why You Should Too.” In it, I briefly talked about something which struck a chord with many people: It was the driving force as to why I have an insurmountable amount of respect for the uniqueness and existence of every person I meet in my life. That thing, is gratitude.

            If you follow me on Instagram, you know lately I’ve been posting a lot about gratitude. That’s because I’ve recently had a mindset shift (more so an addition). One of my core principles I’ve now incorporated, almost religiously, is gratitude for everything.

            I can talk about all the things I’m grateful for and it’d seem like my life is this completely smooth, amazing, undisturbed, and easygoing wave, but please don’t get the wrong message. I have my share of struggles, pains, misery, boredom, irritation, sadness, anger, and even *gasp* cynicism. The only difference is that the insurmountable levels of gratitude I have for everything pulls me back to that neutral state of happiness. I don’t say this for you to pity me or even to be impressed, but to impress upon you that you yourself can hold gratitude as a core principle of yours. Your hardships aren’t the problem, your attitude toward them is! I’m grateful for my hardships; they’ve helped me grow. Gratitude is my hack for consistent happiness.

            The reason I have so much love for people is because my mindset takes more of a Meta approach. I look beyond the petty things which tend to staunch relationships from fully blossoming. Arguing, miscommunication, and petty disagreements are terrible reasons to end friendships or any other relationship, trust me. That’s not to say that if you no longer vibe with a person, don’t leave, but rather don’t let minor disagreements, miscommunication, and fleeting tension interrupt that connecting vibe you have with someone. There are plenty of good reasons to end a relationship. These are not them.

            What do I have to be grateful for? So much that you’d get bored as I drone on about everything I care about, so rather than do that, allow me to talk about the two main things I think drive me every day to be in a consistent state of happiness, and fearlessly have so much love for others.

1.) Grateful for my existence

            This is my driving force for getting up in the morning and doing things that I’m sometimes uncomfortable doing. The odds for my existence, for anyone’s existence, are astronomical. It may be even higher than what Gary Vaynerchuck has settled on: Four-hundred trillion to one. That’s 400,000,000,000,000 : 000,000,000,000,001.

            To consider the scale of the odds, one need only to look to the stars—to our own solar system. We only have 1 habitable planet (at the moment), which if you look at the history of Earth, had a violent beginning that it almost didn’t survive.

            What about being born? What if mom and dad waited an additional minute, or had an extra drink before having sex, would your conscience exist as it is? What if dad pulled out in time? I’m being silly, but serious at the same time so you understand the scale of the odds.

            I would’ve had an older full brother, you know, but he died shortly at birth. How come my conscience wasn’t in his body as opposed to mine? We can argue about conscience and use examples like the Philosopher’s Zombie, or acknowledge that your sensory experience is a result of the biological processes of your bodily functions but the point stands nonetheless.

            I didn’t even incorporate all the other odds, such as time period, but the point has been well made; I am so grateful that I’m alive and able to experience this beautiful world.

2.) Grateful for my chance to interact with others

            Just as how grateful I am that I’m alive, I also consider the odds of each extraordinary individual I meet. Not only that, but I also consider the fact that the people I’ve come across could have lived anywhere else in the world, been anywhere else in the world, and yet they managed to enter and intertwine their lives with mine for a period of time. How lucky am I to have met someone who I vibed with so beautifully, even if it for an hour, a day, three weeks, five years, perhaps even the remainder of my life? Yes, I would like the latter, but that doesn’t make the shorter time spans any less valuable.

            Now think back to that argument you may have had with your friend, your spouse, your partner. I’m betting it seems pretty insignificant in the grand scale of things, now. That’s because it is, my friends.

            It’s easy for me to tell people that I love them because I do. With the mindset I outlined, do you think it’s easier for me to express it? The only thing that keeps me from telling everyone that I love them is the fear that people have of being told that they’re loved, and again that’s because as I said in “Why I Catch Feelings, and Why You Should Too,” that’s because people aren’t used to it.

            But I believe that if we adopt this core principle of gratitude as a part of our mindset, people will be open to receiving love, experience an even higher level of happiness, and be less hesitant in spreading the love.

Much love,

~Dylan